Wimbledon, The Crooked Billet

The Crooked Billet

 Walkers: Mrs P, Farty, TB, and me.

Distance: 7.5miles

Found: Tissues and Wimbledon

Time Taken: including lunch, all day!

A streetcar named nostalgia (thank you, Mon) and wombling round Wimbledon.

 Another episode in the occasional series, the Rahras go forth. (urban section or Arborfield London Explorers (ALE))

Croydon Tramlink

It was a beautiful day with gin clear skies, our favourite, as Mrs P and I girded our loins and boarded the Uckfield "Express" to Croydon to meet up with Farty and TB.  This "service" can be unreliable to say the least, and often morphs into a bus ride, but today all went to plan and Farty and TB were waiting for us, and we set off to board a tram to Wimbledon. Mrs P and I are impressed by the tram system, we don't have such things in the provinces, it was quite like being oop north.  I do remember trolley buses around London as a kid though. (Oh god, she's off)

We arrived safely at Wimbledon Station and set off up the High Street.  My, how it had changed.  There was going to be a lot of this today, as I used to live nearby.  The only shop I recognised was Ely's where my mum went shopping on the morning of her wedding with her bridesmaid, as you do.  I think there was a sale on.  

Our first stop was at St. Mary's church, the one you see in the background at Wimbledon tennis.  Farty

had an urge to see the tomb of Sir Joseph Bazalguette, designer of the London sewer system after the "big stink" of 1858.  Farty and TB had a similar problem some years ago after a particularly hot vindaloo.  Sir Joseph was buried in a mausoleum with several relatives - all very grand.  We had a good nose round.  Inside the church was a plaque dedicated to Canon Norman Hook.  This rang a bell with Farty, and sure enough she later discovered he had christened her all those years ago.  (Sorry Mon!)  What a memory, and only 6 months old!  Leaving the church we were now on a road skirting Wimbledon golf course, very exclusive, with des reses, & full of character.  Sadly some of these houses were being bulldozed and replaced by square buildings a la Kevin Mcloud's Grand Designs.  Such a shame. 

We arrived at the entrance to Wimbledon Park itself, (nostalgia alert), where I spent many happy hours on the swings.  Proper swings, you remember, really tall, where you could swing until you were horizontal, and probably fell on to concrete beneath.  Now they're little plastic things with sand underneath.  Pah!  Onwards towards the lake where Farty remembered being brought as a child by her granny, who lived in Wimbledon.  What a coincidence.  We could have been there at the same time.  Come to think of it, I was once pushed in by a little blond girl.......We were close to Southfields where I was brought up.  (Oh oh, memory lane again).  It seemed a shame not to have a look round.  Lots of changes of course, and people of, how shall I put this, a different hue from the 50s and 60s.  There's a big South African contingent living here now, and several biltong shops which Farty, Mrs P, and TB could'nt resist.  Try as I might, I can't get my head, or gob, round biltong.  It looks like the sort of stuff Sir J. Bazulguette would have dealt with.  On into the town, and lo and behold, there was the dentist Farty used to visit.  Around the corner was Sutherland Grove where I grew up, a nice road with plane trees, on one of which Dad measured my sister and me. 

The marks long since gone, probably 20 feet up!  The house itself was transformed with extensions and 2 plastic lions either side of the front door.  OMG!  It doesn't always do to go back.

We about turned and headed for the common.  "Follow me!" I cried, confidently, "I know a short cut!"  Wrong!  Estates seemed to have popped up everywhere.  Quelle shock.  Farty got us back on track, and we stopped off at the Buddhapadipa Buddhist temple. 

In Wimbledon?  Who knew.  It's a fantastically ornate building, and the air was heavy with incense.  Monks drifted about, looking serene.  Maybe it wasn't incense.  Feeling peckish now, we hot footed it on to the Crooked Billet, where my mates and me used to indulge in a bit of underage drinking.  A schoolfriend passed her driving test at 17, and having acquired an ancient Austin 1100, 6 of us would pile in, (no probs, no seat belts), and head for the pub.  Unfortunately the friend had a withered right leg due to polio, and all the controls were around the steering wheel.  Recipe for disaster, especially after a lot of elderflower wine.  Bit sickly really, none of your tequilla slammers back then.  We lived to tell the tale.  We settled down in the warm welcoming pub, which was situated next to some cinque port houses for men over 55.  God knows where the women were.  Probably dead of exhaustion after having 10 kids.  The food was fab.  Pork belly for Farty, and good old fish and chips for the rest of us, with triple cooked chips.  Yum.  It was starting to get dark and a light drizzle was falling, so we made a move.  The Uckfield "Express" waits for no man.  We reached Wimbledon station and boarded the tram.  Ay oop, we'd had a reet champion time!

Apologies, this has turned into All Wend's Yesterdays! I can hear the yawning from here!  xxxxx

Horsted Keynes, Bluebell Railway

Thursday 31st July

Walkers: Mrs P, Sue and Minnie, Mon, TB and me

 

Length of walk: 5 miles

The Tornado whips up a storm.

A welcome return to some Rahra rambling which has been on hold for a while due to mud, elderly parents and general debility!   We met up at West Hoathly car park and set off to the Bluebell Railway crossing near Sharpthorne tunnel in time to see the magnificent Tornado steam past.  Farty had kindly sorted out a timetable of viewing points for us.  We waited expectantly.  We thought we heard a toot but it may have been TB as he had his ear nervously pressed to the track a la Tonto.  He's now sporting what he describes as his ear trumpets and doesn't miss a thing, making it tricky to talk about him.  Other enthusiastic fanatics were there.  If only it had been slightly cooler we could have worn our anoraks.  I stood poised, camera in hand.  "Wend, you're facing the wrong way" said Farty despairingly.  Actually, when the train appeared it was back to front, so that might have worked. We would have preferred full frontal though.

Time for the walk proper to begin, and we set off through glorious countryside, the sun beating down, passing lovely cottages and properties, one with a black horse with rigor mortis in the garden.  Eh?  A very convincing model.  Some road walking was required alongside the Weir Wood reservoir.  All very windy, hilly, and treacherous, with cars whizzing perilously close.  One driver shouted "get off the road!" and got a few two and one fingers.  Don't mess with us!  Luckily we caught up with a school group and followed their rather stern teacher's instructions to "KEEP IN LINE", and "CAR!" The children eyed us warily, having just witnessed our rather unseemly hand gestures.  Were we perhaps escapees from the home for the bewildered?  We thankfully left the road and stopped for refreshments by some huge limestone rocks that you often see in this part of the world.  Mrs. P kindly provided chunks of Alan's birthday cake.  He may not be best pleased when he next revisits the cake tin!  At this point TB needed a lavatree break, and was about to expose all when the school children reappearred.  This would have been the final straw for the poor mites. They were already traumatised by our earlier behaviour, and as Farty said, the last thing they needed was a Rolf Harris moment.  This reminded me that my sister had a Rolf Harris moment years ago at a book signing, when having signed his book, Rolf stood up and kissed her full on the lips!  She was mortified, turned puce and fled.  He just laughed.  Just shows you, his tentacles spread far and wide.  And other things that sound similar.

Time to move on, and we found ourselves in a shady glade where we came upon.......MUD!  NOOO!  I don't mind it as you know.  Mrs. P suffered some sock seepage, though it didn't look particularly mud coloured.  As Farty said, you often don't know you've got the squits until you take your bicycle clips off.  That Roedean education certainly paid off.  Next was quite a steep hill which took us to our next vantage point on the Bluebell to view another train.  TB positioned himself in the middle of the track and received a toot for his recklessness.  We waved at the passengers and they waved back.  We love doing this, I don't know why, it's rather sweet and British!  We were conscious that time was marching on, our table was booked for 1.30, so we cut the walk short slightly.  This is always disappointing for TB and me, but needs must.  We got to the Cat with time to spare, and sank gratefully into chairs outside under an umbrella.  The food here is always good, if a bit pricey, but you get what you pay for.  The fish and chips were excellent, as was Sue's ham egg and chips.  During conversation it transpired that Farty and TB have been invited to Mauritius by their gay neighbour who is about to become High (camp) commissioner there.  Sounds like something from Gilbert and Sullivan. How fab though.  They'll be staying at the official residence and waited on by punkah wallahs.  Those were the days. 

Just time to see the Tornado coming the other way through Sharpthorne Tunnel, this time the right way round, (and me!).  Quite a spectacle, and reminiscent of the Railway Children.  We waved our knickers and truss (I didn't know Farty wore one), and went home tired but happy.

See you all soon, Wend xxx

Go (to Penge) West young man!

Venue:  Yes, you guessed it, Penge West!

Walkers:  Farty, TB and Mrs P - the northern hemisphere urbanites!  The southern hemisphere rurals aka Miss Windy Nohills and Clat were doing a gentler Reigate Hill walk.

Distance:  8 1/2 miles

Time taken:  Most of the day due to leisurely stops for lunch and ice cream in the park!

Find of the walk:  Freddie's school bag

Mrs P arrived on the Uckfield Express - which this time was actually running - bang on time at East Croydon to be met on the platform by a very welcoming welcome committee in the form of Farty and TB.  We quickly made our way to Norwood Junction where we caught the Overground to Penge West - a total journey of 15 mins, so we started our walk by 10.45.  Today Farty had planned a 'lollipop' walk.

Mrs P, yours truly, tried once again to contain her provincial excitement about all
things 'London' and 'Urban' - and failed miserably!  We headed straight into Crystal Palace Park which was looking quite beautiful in the glorious sunshine.  We stopped to look a the ship's bell from WW1 and to have our photos taken by the Sphinx.

Onward to Sydenham Hill with its lovely houses and stunning views over London.  (Sydenham Hill is one of the highest spots in London.)  We caught glimpses of the Shard and the Wembley Arch as the visibility today was excellent.

Then into Dulwich Woods where we could well have been in the middle of deepest Sussex as it was so quiet - well, apart from the odd aircraft overhead which I suppose is just like Sussex too!  Onward past the manicured greens of Dulwich and Sydenham Hill Golf Course, arriving at Dulwich itself.
We stopped at the gate house to the Dulwich private estate, took pictures and had a chat with the friendly gateman who agreed with TB that it was the only paying toll in London apart from that other small one over at Dartford!  Bet the houses were exceptionally posh in the estate but we moved on as Dulwich Village and Gail's Bakery were calling.

We passed Dulwich College - a beautiful building where Mon informed us Shackleton's boat from the Antarctic is on display, Shackleton being one of Dulwich's old boys.  Usually out of bounds to the public, she was able to see it on one of the college's infrequent open days.  An extremely polite young man (no, not George Clooney, he was busy at Reigate Hill!) entered the college as we took pictures (it is exam week) - clearly all that money and history buys not just an expensive education but excellent manners and diction!  We know our place ..... so carried on towards the bakery, finding Freddie's bag along the way.  Having checked for phone numbers (not a chance, just his reading record) we hung it on the railings for him, or more like his Mum,  hopefully to find it later.

Dulwich Village is very pretty and was full of yummy mummies having coffees/lunch sitting in the sunshine.  We dived straight into the bakery and came out with bags stuffed full of their lovely offerings which of course meant we were then starving hungry and in need of lunch ourselves!  We turned back into the park to head for the pub.

The park was full of all the remaining yummies and their tiny offspring - talking of which we kept stopping to ooo and ahhh and the wildlife and their tiny offspring!  Amazing wildlife everywhere (no, not the human kind, this is Dulwich after all) - some cute goslings with very proud mum and dad, baby coots who were quite adorable as they tried to climb back onto their nest having dipped their toes in the water, ducks and cygnets.  Later on in the day we also saw a magnificent heron, some grebes (very impressively identified by Farty) .......... and the ubiquitous rat scurrying across the path towards the water.  Hopefully not after our gorgeous fluffy babies ........

So, through Sydenham Woods and to the pub - Dulwich Wood House.

A super pub, friendly staff and loads of tables outside in the shade to chose from.  So lovely to have pubs that serve food all day - and the food was excellent too.
Fish and Chips all round!  Not quite the size of Cornwall but not far off!
It was almost too comfortable sitting in the sun so we moved on before we felt the call of a bucket of wine .... back through Sydenham Woods, passing John Logie Baird's house on the way.  Mon took us to see the disused railway tunnel that used to go to Crystal Palace which has now been boarded up but is a major bat nesting site.  We walked through the park in a different direction, stopping to look at the wonderfully restored Crystal Palace station and on to the

dinosaur lake - yes, really -  complete with all manner of dinosaurs and I don't mean cabin crew from our era! A young dad walked past with his 2 toddlers, one of whom was demanding ice cream - that was it, Mon and I turned all toddlerish on TB and demanded to be taken to the cafe too!  So we ended up in the park cafe with our yummy double scoops enjoying the late afternoon sunshine, getting more and more chilled (sorry!), feeling that we could quite happily have moved on a pub for the rest of the afternoon/evening.

However, the clarion call of the Uckfield Express beckoned  so reluctantly we walked back towards Penge West and East Croydon.  Farewells bid all round - it had been a really lovely day with so much variety: parks, woods, views, lovely houses and gardens, wildlife, history - and of course, great company.

I'm off down south again for the next 4-5 weeks, so Farty & TB will be continuing their urban walks but I'm sure there will be some liaising going on so hopefully we can all meet up again very soon.

See you soon! xx

Green grows the city, 0

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