Tandridge - The Barley Mow

Tuesday 30 October

Show Us Your Ghoulies

Walkers:  Farty, T.B., 4 Legs, Windy, Mrs Provincial, Lil and Clat.  Sally is in China , and we are pleased to report that baby Noah is making good progress. 
Distance: 7 1/2 miles
Find:  More horrible mud
  
Well, today was our Halloween walk, and some of the outfits which turned up were brilliant.  A selection of witches' hats, false noses, masks, head-gear and other adornments to be seen, with, I think, Mrs P having the most props about her personage - she even had a wand, which reminds me of a story about a gay bloke and his umbrella in New York.

Time for the off and once again, due to prompt arrivals we were able to depart at 1020 - an absolute record.  The previously miserable weather had cleared-up for us, and we walked with blue skies and sunshine, albeit it treacherously muddy underfoot.  We were heading East, and to some un-discovered patches to walk in.  Passing Southlands, which is a country house now converted into apartments, we entered some lovely leafy woods, and then came to Chris's catastrophe footbridge where she came a cropper before - but not today, as we used the ditch instead.
 
Over some very muddy fields and pathways and then a northerly direction on road, to Stocketts Manor, where a sign told us to stick to the designated pathways, so we didn't.  This is because of lakes of water with deep mud underneath, prevented our passage,  and Lil forged a path through thickets and thinnets to get us back to a drier pathway. Clat lost a hairslide here, but gallant T.B. found it - she later lost a hairband, and the gallant T.B. and Farty found it - what will she lose next?  Unfortunately you cannot find her marbles which she loses on a regular basis.  Let's continue shall we? 
More trekking over muddy fields to investigate a pub for maybe future use.  We found ourselves in Holland - and with no ferry in sight, we came to the pub - The Diamond.  As we approached, the door flew open and out burst the chef/landlord.  'Are you coming in then?' he asked - 'er no, but maybe another week.'  He gave us  a menu, told us we were welcome to park there, and couldn't be more welcoming - a real diamond geezer then?  While all this was going on, Sue and Chris took the opportunity of using their loos, and pronounced them clean and acceptable.

We turned round and headed down-lane before some more trekking - this time past Foyles Farm where they have the most glorious bulls - showing us some different kinds of ghoulies.  We were on the way home by now and the going was hard, due to the ever-present mud.  At one point a wire across our path, looked suspiciously like it was electric - so some careful clambering was performed - we didn't want to damage our lady and gentleman parts did we?  We asked after Windy's injury from last week - she told us her leg wasn't livid  any more - it was furious. 

We were home - into the pub - oh dear, no decorations, so , no atmosphere, and we felt a bit odd walking in with our witches gear, ready for a hag roast - ha ha ha ha ha.  The barmaid wasn't very welcoming, and told us straight away that the duck was off (could be a joke there), and only one portion of liver left - and we are very pleased to meet you, too.  The place was cold, another pub ruined by lack of ooomph and input.  We did our ordering - no, the place hasn't changed hands, and yes, the light menu was available but wasn't shown to us.  After twiddling her hair for a bit, and mooning over the till, our food was fetched and served.  Heavily salted and not that nice for some - Chris and Sue had to assemble their own wraps, Windy said her gammon was tough (another joke there somewhere?), but Mrs P liked her cod - good job someone was happy.

The lady in question then borrowed Windy's Daily Mail, which she always supplies T.B with, due to his lack of interest in what we ladies talk about - fair enough.  She wanted to look at her horoscope which today would have said that a career in the pub industry would  not be an ideal choice.  Mrs P then distributed some wonderful Halloween chocs, so after eating a few ghosts and pumpkins (thank you sooooooo much),  and for the glorious flapjacks too.  Sorry to say, Mrs P will be venturing back to her erection soon, we shall miss her, and can't wait for her return - bon voyage and adieu.  We paid up and cleared off.  Don't think this will be a venue for the future, however, we have Holland to explore, so the clogs are out, and the tulip bulbs are planted - Skol!!! Next week?